For the new mommies to be....


> After the baby was born, the panicked Japanese father went to
> see the obstetrician.
>
> "Doctor," he said, "I don't mind telling you, but I'm a little upset
> because my daughter has red hair. She can't possibly be
> mine."
>
> "Nonsense," the doctor said. "Even though you and your wife
> both have black hair, one of your ancestors may have
> contributed red hair to the gene pool."
>
> "It isn't possible," the man insisted. "We're pure Asian."
>
> "Well," said the doctor, "let me ask you this. How often do you
> have sex?"
>
> The man seemed ashamed. "I've been working very hard for the
> past year. We only made love once or twice a month."
>
> "There you have it!" the doctor said confidently. "It's just rust."

Here's a better baby joke:

> >A woman gives birth to a baby, and afterwards, the
> > >doctor comes in, and he says, "I have to tell you
> > >something about your baby."
> > >
> > >The woman sits up in bed and says, "What's wrong with
> > >my baby, Doctor? What's wrong???"
> > >
> > >The doctor says, "Well, now, nothing's wrong, exactly,
> > >but your baby is a little bit different. Your baby is
> > >a hermaphrodite."
> > >
> > >The woman says, "A hermaphrodite... what's that???"
> > >
> > >The doctor says, "Well, it means your baby has
> > >the...er... features... of a male and a female."
> > >
> > >The woman turns pale. She says, "Oh my god! You mean
> > >it has a penis... AND a brain?"